By now many of us have seen the Instagram video of OG_NewNew from New Orleans and her Public Service Announcement discussing that no matter what when asked the question of how many sexual partners she’s had the answer is 4!
She went into further detail with how she came to the number (i.e. If multiple guys have the same name then they only count as one person). This video has sparked multiple conversations amongst many of my friends on what is the infatuation with knowing someone’s sexual past and specifics such as HOW MANY!!!
Why do we get so caught up on how many people someone has been with? Although this goes for both male and female I find that often times it is the guy who asks this question and gets hung up on the numbers. BUT WHY?!! If someone has a clean bill of health, does my “body count” matter? Especially when most males often have double and even triple digit numbers by the time they are 30 years old. Does a woman’s body count lower her value? What is too high a number for both male and female to be deemed acceptable and not a hoe? What number is a deal breaker?
I’ve always been proud of who I am and embraced my sexuality but goodness the question seems to pop up as soon as you start storytelling and feeling more comfortable in the conversation. When you choose the honest answer, folks can’t handle it. I was honest with my numbers with someone recently and the crickets started chirping as the phone got quiet. In that moment, I knew he was not the one for me. LOL.
DO NOT ASK A QUESTION YOU CANNOT HANDLE THE ANSWER TO!!!
If I have not been sexually active with someone in your inner circle, THEN IT DOESN’T MATTER. We get so hung up on someone’s past that we miss out on the true gem that they are. Anything before you met this person, honestly, has nothing to do with you *Insert Kanye Shrug*. Try looking at it from a perspective of you being an owner of a company and you have a position to be filled and you don’t just want anyone, you want someone with EXPERIENCE and maybe even a list of references!!!!
Until you guys can handle the truth I guess the answer is FOUR!
Follow Holley Jay @theholleyjay on instagram.